Online Dating

If You Have Never Had a Relationship….

So? You have never been in a long-term relationship. And? Has your car ever gone through a puddle? Oh, you don’t drive. Have you ever stepped in a puddle? Gotten your feet wet? Swam with the fishes? Do not fret, as the cliché goes, there is a first for everything, but I don’t like to use clichés. I like chocolate sprinkles on my ice cream and I like dipping French fries in chocolate shakes. Dogs are preferable over cats. Boxers over briefs. I use bad-tasting red wine when I cook because it makes the meal taste better, and I crave graham crackers in milk, warm chocolate pudding and cheese flavored crackers. Do you get the point?

If you have never been in a relationship, and find yourself dating someone or liking someone with whom you would like to have a relationship, the last trait you want to exhibit is fear. It muddies everything! It’s like a bad case of drooling in your morning cereal. Stop it! Resist it! Fear is an empty feeling; it hasn’t any power – only the power you choose to give it. Fear is merely a prediction; you don’t know what will happen unless you dive in and find out…..unless you get wet! What you do fear, your partner will sense. It will mar your beginning, and the beginning days of any relationship can make it or break it (now you’ve made me use TWO clichés!)

If you haven’t any fear, and you simply have never been in a relationship and would like to give one a try, I envy you. A first relationship where there exists a mutual commitment is magical. I remember….everything feels like it is for the first time, because it really is! Sharing and witnessing life with another is…..is sometimes beyond words. Holding another hand in your own. Brushing the back of your hand in tenderness, along a cheek that belongs to the face that you adore. Thinking of another while you shop for yourself, wondering what you might get to surprise them. Thinking of someone else’s emotions, besides your own. Walking arm in arm through a tree-lined park on a breezy fall day. Whispering words of love and endearment atop the pillow you share. Holding. Hugging. Laughing. I urge YOU who has never had a relationship before, to surrender. It will be like your first ice cream cone or getting excited over your first sight of innocent nudity in an R-rated movie. It will make your blood flow in a way it never has; you will feel your heart invest itself in whomever you allow it to invest.

Being in a committed relationship is brave and thus admirable. You must not be concerned with what might be lost of your freedom. I believe everyone should be in at least one long relationship in his or her life. Everyone should feel the pangs of love as it envelopes and fills a soul. Surrender. Fear nothing. No matter how old you think you may be, it is never too late to have a relationship. And know this: You are never alone.

So….you have never been in a relationship? And? What are you waiting for? I dare you to be happier. I dare you to risk what is safe. With every relationship come benefits, whether it lasts or ends. You won’t have to give up your cookies and milk at midnight. Or your vodka Martini on Fridays. Or your online football game. Or your Sudoku puzzles. Now, smile and go step in a puddle! Get over yourself and if you see a budding relationship on the horizon, do it! Stick with it! Especially if it is your first. You can’t spend your entire life running away from yourself. There is so much in life to see. Another half just might help you to see it. After all, in the end, we are all here for each other.